I messed up again
Dear Lord,
I let someone’s words and attitude anger me,
make me defensive,
and feel upset.
I didn’t lose my temper or act rudely–
but I wasn’t gracious, either.
I said things that were unnecessary–and who’s to say that I wasn’t offensive?
I wasn’t kind
because I didn’t put myself in their shoes.
I didn’t empathize.
I didn’t ask questions.
I just challenged, argued my point, and decided to view them as
arrogant,
stubborn,
or at best, difficult.
But I was all those things.
I see that now, and I regret it.
Sin is so subtle and tricky–
it seeps in through insecurity and pain
and defends my right to feel offended by another person’s words or actions.
Sin makes me guard myself and defend myself even when I’m not in danger.
It makes me feel misunderstood, alone, abandoned, and discouraged.
Probably like this person felt.
Being wounded in the past makes me feel wounded all the time.
That’s why I need you.
Lord, heal my wounds.
Humble my heart.
I confess my sin to you.
Change my perspective.
Alter my attitude.
I repent for my own thoughts, feelings, and words.
Remember that I am dust–
but form that dust into your image.
Somehow, I bear your likeness,
even when I’m not being much like you.
Please forgive me for being selfish and defensive.
I pray against this stronghold in my life–
the excuses I make to see things from one perspective and judge others who disagree.
Close up my wounds and help me live in your strength regardless of the pain I carry.
Because other people are carrying pain, too,
and I must be mindful and careful with them.
Lord, I don’t want to interfere with your Spirit,
ever.
I want more of it.
Fill me and use me.
Thank you for your forgiveness and grace in my life.
Continue to fashion this dusty soul into the image of your Son.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.
As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we were formed, he remembers that we are dust. (Psalm 103:13-14)
I said, “I will watch my ways and keep my tongue from sin; I will put a muzzle on my mouth as long as the wicked are in my presence. But when I was silent and still, not even saying anything good, my anguish increased. My heart grew hot within me, and as I meditated, the fire burned; then I spoke with my tongue… But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you. Save me from all my transgressions; do not make me scorn like one of he fools.” (Psalm 39: 1-3, 7-8)